Doing Life

So for the sake of not over staying my welcome, I am thinking that maybe weekly posts are in order.  I know some of you will be interested in how the "transition" phase is going and learning about Daria's Degnan firsts.  They are constant right now.

We have been home for nearly one week. It was exactly this time last week when we were boarding what would be boarding the first of the last airplanes home.  Slowly we are all recovering from jet lag, slower for some of us than others.  But it really is amazing how much easier it is to "cope" when you are on your home turf.

She survived her first track meet and her first church service which included a public introduction.  She joined us girls as we saw Emma off to prom.  She has met the entire Grace Place staff and several of my favorite customers who have been following along with our journey.  We braved a Super Target where she got to pick out her first jeans, all on her own.  Her only observation, it was very big.  Even a trip to Starbucks was in order, all she wanted was a banana and water.

She ate what was likely her first steak dinner complete with baked potatoes loaded up with sour cream and butter, grilled asparagus and fresh warm bread.  She skipped the asparagus but truly went to town with the sour cream.  On Wednesday we introduced her to tacos, while she loved the idea of a taco, she didn't like much of what went into the taco.  The one exception, you guessed it, sour cream.  She actually ate a taco that consisted of lettuce, tomato and a bunch of sour cream.  It seems her two favorite foods are bananas and Gogurt.  She had fun trying to figure out the different flavors, she likes the cotton candy flavor the best, even though she had no idea what cotton candy was.  That was a funny one, actually had to pull up a picture of cotton candy online.  Don't think she has ever had cotton candy, that will have to change especially considering that it is one of my all time favorites.

We have discovered that she truly does love being outside and would probably go on 10 walks a day if we could do it.  She will walk up and simply say "walk."  Monday she found a football and brought it to me and asked to walk.  We headed out with the dog and the football.  We didn't even make it out of the yard before she was kicking the ball, it was a little funny trying to explain to her not to kick into anyones yard.  A football is a new thing in her world, but she could hardly wait to get to the park and start throwing it around.  And for the record, I got to teach her how to hold it and throw a spiral.  So glad my dad taught me all those important things.  After that she asked "park" and then went on to tell me, her words here, "park is very nice."

That same day, as the family all got home, she would ask each and every one to go play football with her.  Very cute!  Before I knew it she had come in and found a bat and ball and was headed out to see who might play that with her.  Again, baseball is not normal in Ukraine and again I am pretty sure that she had never actually held a bat in her hands.  Jamie, Lily and Daria headed off to the field to play...again trying to explain the risk of hitting the ball into someones yard or worse yet, through a window was a funny conversation.

Jamie introduced her to frisbee, working on all those American classics.  She did finally find a soccer and was proud to tell me that it was a football. Before long she had convinced Lily to come out and kick the ball around.  Again, another lesson on kicking away from houses.

The wii is the game of choice today.  She had a blast with Mario Cart tonight.  Slick little thing, conveniently when things aren't going her way...oops the batteries fell out of her remote.  That didn't go over real well with Lily.

The trampoline is a novelty, I think she may have experienced that in Spain but as I was folding laundry I was watching her jump.  The freedom on her face was evident.  She was just bouncing and smiling, ear to ear smile.

It seems that everywhere we go, we are drawing attention.  Kind of goes along with living in a small town and knowing most everyone.  She has met countless people.  It has to be a bit overwhelming, everyone knows her name, her story, but she has no idea who any of these people are or for that matter, how they possibly know so much about her.   They all are so kind and gracious, introducing themselves and most of then offering a hug, which to my surprise she is happy to return.  No shying away or hiding from this girl.  

She has met her cowboy grandpa which, for the record was priceless.  Cowboys are as American as it gets and she looked up at him and his big black cowboy hat with the biggest eyes I have seen.  She immediately took him over to the picture on our living room wall of my great-great grandpa, another cowboy and his horse.  She managed to get him in the back yard with the football too.  Before long she was planted at table, sharing a seat with her new grandpa, showing him pictures of her life in Ukraine.  Before he left she had to make sure that he had a Ukrainian chocolate bar to take home.  I was so touched by the interaction between them.  I am pretty sure that she can't wait to go to the ranch and see real horse and cows and maybe even get to ride a horse with her grandpa.

We have her registered to start school on Monday.  She has met her new teacher, Mr. Book and a few of her classmates.  She even got to go to the showcase night at school and see Lily and what will be her whole class, doing there musical showcase for the year.

Access to food, anytime she wants it, is really a big one.  I am sure she is overwhelmed by the options and the quantity.  When I came home from the grocery store with many bags of food, her eyes about popped out of her head.  That was more food in one place, at one time than she could possibly imagine. So far she has eaten most everything we have served.  Don't really think she likes green veggies and she won't put any kind of dressing on her salad.

On Tuesday, as soon as we got home from dropping Lily off at school she was asking for a walk.  I told her that I had some work that I needed to do first and that we would go after awhile.  She didn't like that answer and tried to convince me that she could go on her own.  That led us right to google translate where she continued the debate about why it was a good idea.  I told her until she knew her phone number, address and how to ask for help that she couldn't go anywhere by herself.  She went straight to work on learning them.  Then she figured, well if she won't let me go for a walk maybe the park...again, I had to explain even Lily doesn't go to the park alone and she has lived her for 5 years.  Got to admire her gumption.

Emma was trying to talk with her after dinner one night, telling her what different things were in English and then asking Daria to say it in Russian.  It was interesting to me that she did not want to say the words, not in English or in Russian.  She wanted to hear what the words were but would just smile and giggle when Emma would try to convince her to say it.  She is a bit more willing to try in English than to say it in Russian.

The other three girls have been amazing, they continue to make me proud.  Daria even has Annabelle succumbing to nightly hugs.  For some reason Annie just can't say no to her.  Lily has been a great trooper, not batting an eye when Daria is showered with gifts or attention.  Emma has yet to say no when she has asked her to play a game, either outside, the iPad or on the wii.  They have been awesome at trying to show her the ropes.

On a personal note, I just can't get over how good it feels to be home.  Seeing the mountains each morning as I drive into town.  Hearing the birds chirp, the trees that are nearly in full bloom, hearing kids laughing and playing outside.  Even looking up and seeing airplanes...not having to carry jugs of water blocks every other day.  Taking money out of my wallet and not having to think twice about how much it is.  Driving through town and actually stopping my car and hopping out to go say hi to a friend I haven't seen in months, months...understanding everything that is going on around me.  My own bed, my cloths...I took 2 pairs of jeans and like 6 shirts with me to Ukraine, I don't care if I ever see any of them again.  Not to mention the shoes...no boots are going on these feet, it is flip flops and some cute heals for me.  I forgot how many cloths I had, but I am having to "reclaim" many items from my thieving teenagers who seem to have laid claim to my wardrobe while I was away.  I had to get gas in the van the other day, that was bizarre.  I haven't done that in months.  I found myself walking around in awe in Target today.  I had forgotten all the option out there.  I have gotten up with all my girls, made more school lunches this week than I have all year.  Actually, truth be told, I have made more lunches this week than I have in the past two years combined.  I have made dinner four out of the past five nights, Annabelle made one.  I have seen all the girls off to school, stayed up on laundry (don't panic, the folding is still a problem).  I have been present and available, ah...so very nice.

Some new habits are still sticking around.  I have watched less than 2 hours of tv since I got home.  And the walking that was just a fact of life in Ukraine is actually something that I enjoy for some personal time here.  Too bad it is allergy season, except this year I just don't think even the allergies are going to keep me inside.

I have adored reconnecting with so many friends, the hugs are like medicine to my soul.  It has been like seeing long lost friends around every corner.  I feel so loved!

Today is April 19, which in my world is a very significant day.  It is my sisters birthday.  She would have been 48 years old today.  For those of you who don't know, she died nearly 17 years ago from the treatment of Leukemia.  She was the most amazing and influential person in my life.  Not a day goes by that I don't miss her.  I am proud to be her little sister.  Sometimes I wonder what she would have thought of the events of my life over the past couple of months.  While I am sure she would have been proud, I know that at several different points, she would have given me the classic "kick in the pants" and told me to pull it together.  Then she would have had a good cry with me and told me it was going to be all right.  She was a great wife, an amazing mom and the best sister anyone could have ever asked for.  I learned a lot about what NOT to do from her early in life and a lot about what TO do later in life.  She never chose the easy road but in the end she chose the right road.  I owe a lot to her for helping me find my way and making me who I am today.  She blazed the trail, set the standard.  I miss you Bobbi Sue Lucia..........and so do so many others:)

In the next week or so we will be getting a new family photo taken.  I can't wait to get our profile picture updated and some new and improved photos up on our walls at home.  It is important to get some pictures up that include Daria, since right now everywhere she turns are all these picture of the 5 of us.  I want her to feel like she is very much part of this family and will be forever.  She needs to see herself on our walls.

One week into this next phase of our journey and we are enjoying the process of figuring out how to Do Life.  Let the true adventure begin.